One of the notable movies celebrating a milestone anniversary in 2023 is True Romance. The movie turns 30 years old this year and remains a vibrant crime story that fans love to revisit and that new fans are still discovering all the time. Of course, with a script by Quentin Tarantino, one of the reasons for its rewatchability is the amazing dialogue. From the laugh-out-loud moments to the dark and threatening ones, True Romance has endless great quotes to look back on.
Though Tarantino did not direct the movie (it is a Tony Scott film), it still has his distinct feel. One of the dead giveaways is the brilliant and spell-binding dialogue. It remains one of the most quotable of Tarantino’s films and that’s saying something.
Contents
- 1 “I Always Said, If I Had To F*** A Guy, I Mean Had To, If My Life Depended On It… I’d F*** Elvis.”
- 2 “I Had To Come All The Way From The Highway And Byways Of Tallahassee, Florida To Motor City, Detroit To Find My True Love.”
- 3 “He Must Have Thought It Was White Boy Day. It Ain’t White Boy Day, Is It?”
- 4 “I’m Not Scared Of You. I Just Don’t Like You.”
- 5
- 6 “I Eat Every Motherf***ing Thing.”
- 7 “I Like You, Clarence. Always Have. Always Will.”
- 8 “I Think What You Did… Was So Romantic.”
- 9 “If There’s One Thing This Last Week Has Taught Me, It’s Better To Have A Gun And Not Need It Than To Need A Gun And Not Have It.”
- 10 “My Name’s Elliot, And I’m With The Cub Scouts Of America. We’re Selling Uncut Cocaine To Get To The Jamboree.”
- 11 “You’re An Actor. Act, Motherf***er.”
- 12 “Now I Do It Just To Watch Their F***ing Expression Change.”
- 13 “Don’t Condescend Me, Man. I’ll F***in’ Kill Ya, Man.”
- 14 “You’re Sicilian, Huh?”
- 15 “You’re A Cantaloupe.”
- 16 “I Haven’t Killed Anybody Since 1984.”
“I Always Said, If I Had To F*** A Guy, I Mean Had To, If My Life Depended On It… I’d F*** Elvis.”
Clarence
Tarantino really knows how to grab an audience’s attention early on and he can usually do it just with his extraordinary dialogue. Such is the case with the memorable opening scene in this movie when Clarence is first introduced to Clarence.
Clarence is in a bar talking to a young woman about his favorite obsession, Elvis Presley. It is certainly a bold choice to flirt with a girl while talking about his Elvis fantasies. It’s a funny line and shows Clarence as an unusual guy who isn’t afraid to talk at length about the things he loves.
“I Had To Come All The Way From The Highway And Byways Of Tallahassee, Florida To Motor City, Detroit To Find My True Love.”
Alabama
While there have been love stories in Tarantino movies before, True Romance really embraces this with a genuine romance. When listening to the opening narration from Alabama, audiences could be forgiven for thinking this was going to be a sweet romantic tale.
Indeed, these opening lines set the stage for an epic romance and make it seem as though Clarence and Alabama are the ultimate soulmates. However, it doesn’t quite prepare them for the carnage and mayhem which will also be a big part of the story.
“He Must Have Thought It Was White Boy Day. It Ain’t White Boy Day, Is It?”
Drexl
There are a lot of Tarantino side characters who steal the show and there are quite a few in True Romance. One of the most entertaining performances is from Gary Oldman as Drexl, a dreadlock-wearing pimp who likes to pretend he’s black.
After beating up Clarence, he delivers this wonderfully weird line that shows his delusional mind. As terrifying as he can be, he is also hard to take seriously with such a warped idea of himself.
“I’m Not Scared Of You. I Just Don’t Like You.”
Clarence
Clarence is not an action hero who cooly strolls into any situation like a badass. However, he does watch a lot of movies and seems to know how to imitate characters like that. This leads to a tense meeting with the dangerous pimp Drexl.
Drexl attempts to take control of the situation, observing that if Clarence wasn’t scared then he would have sat down and taken some of the food that is offered. Clarence cooly replies that he’s not hungry, he’s not staying and Drexl is mistaking the fact that he doesn’t like him for fear.
“I Eat Every Motherf***ing Thing.”
Big Don
Among the surprisingly star-studded cast of True Romance, Samuel L. Jackson has a tiny role as criminal Big Don. Jackson seems like he was born to say Tarantino’s dialogue. Having appeared in most of Tarantino’s movies, he just sells those wonderful lines so well and he first proved it even before he worked with Tarantino himself.
While at a drug deal, Don and the other thugs have a lively and vulgar conversation about their sexual habits. Jackson proves he is the master at handling this kind of dialogue in this small but hilarious moment.
“I Like You, Clarence. Always Have. Always Will.”
The Mentor
Clarence’s obsession with Elvis goes beyond those odd hypothetical fantasies and proves to be a full-on hallucination. As we see several times in the movie, Clarence imagines Elvis himself is talking to him as a sort of guardian angel.
Played by a mostly unseen Val Kilmer, the addition of the so-called “Mentor” character is brilliantly strange. It adds a fantasy element to this ultra-violent crime story as this Elvis figure guides Clarence on his dangerous journey. His repeated line, “I like you, Clarence. Always have. Always will” shows how much Clarence has lost touch with reality.
“I Think What You Did… Was So Romantic.”
Alabama
Though Clarence might seem like a bit of a dangerous young man with a strange grasp on reality, Alabama has an odd idea of romance as well. She is the heart of the story and the reason Clarence’s actions don’t seem so terrible.
After being married for only a few short days, Clarence comes home to tell Alabama that he killed her former pimp. Breaking down into tears, she tells him she thinks it was so romantic and thus begins their violent and strange love story.
“If There’s One Thing This Last Week Has Taught Me, It’s Better To Have A Gun And Not Need It Than To Need A Gun And Not Have It.”
Clarence
Watching Clarence go from a lonely comic book store clerk to a violent outlaw is a fascinating journey. He takes to the new life very well and proves to be quite good at it, but it becomes clear that everything he is doing is just taken from movies or comic books.
Despite living in a fantasy world, Clarence is a convincing tough guy. After surviving several dangerous situations by the skin of his teeth, Clarence decides to always be prepared for things to go south. As it turns out, it was a good philosophy.
“My Name’s Elliot, And I’m With The Cub Scouts Of America. We’re Selling Uncut Cocaine To Get To The Jamboree.”
Elliot
As the third act of the movie gets ready to kick-off, a new plot development is thrown into the equation. Hollywood assistant Elliot is arrested and forced to be an informant and wear a wire during the drug deal between his producer boss and Clarence.
In a great moment, Elliot is testing out his new communication device with his police handlers. His nervous energy is hilarious even as the tension rises.
“You’re An Actor. Act, Motherf***er.”
Nicholson
The subplot involving Elliot and his work with the cops is another highlight of the movie and adds an interesting new element late in the story. Agents Dimes and Nicholson make for his handlers and are not overly confident with how Elliot can handle the pressure of the situation.
Wearing a wire and heading into the drug deal, Elliot is barely keeping it together. As Nicholson listens over the wire, he offers this hilariously blunt and less-than-helpful advice.
“Now I Do It Just To Watch Their F***ing Expression Change.”
Virgil
Before becoming one of the best TV actors of all time on The Sopranos, James Gandolfini had a very memorable brief role in True Romance. As Virgil, Gandolfini brings a menacing and somewhat vulnerable quality to this hitman role.
After delivering a brutal beating to Alabama, Virgil calmly recounts what it is like the first time he killed someone. He admits to it being hard and even that he got sick as a result. But his cold-blooded description of how little he feels now proves he is not someone with any mercy.
“Don’t Condescend Me, Man. I’ll F***in’ Kill Ya, Man.”
Floyd
One of the biggest surprises in the movie is the amazing and hilarious cameo by Brad Pitt as Floyd. Though Pitt was well on his way to stardom at the time, he appears in this small role as a useless stoner who is constantly seen on the couch.
Pitt is incredibly funny in the part as Floyd unwittingly sets the stage for some of the bloodiest moments in the movie, all the while he is just smoking his bong. His attempt to tough-talk Virgil is one of the movie’s funniest moments. It makes for one of the funniest performances in Pitt’s career.
“You’re Sicilian, Huh?”
Clifford
While the movie is Clarence and Alabama’s story, the most intense, exciting, and memorable scene involves neither of them. The scene involves a gangster named Coccotti who interrogated Clarence’s father Clifford about the whereabouts of his son.
Not willing to give up his son but not wanting to be tortured, Clifford decides to teach Coccotti some history about his Sicilian heritage. It is a brilliantly written scene elevated further by two amazing actors at the height of their talents.
“You’re A Cantaloupe.”
Vincent Coccotti
After Clifford gives Coccotti his racially insensitive history lesson, he decides to twist the knife a little further by referring to Coccotti as a certain vegetable that is meant as a racial slur.
At this point, the audience can pretty much guess what is going to happen to Clifford, but the movie drags out the moment with even more tension. Coccotti laughs at the remark before saying, “You’re a cantaloupe.” It’s a bizarre but brilliant and funny line improvised by Walken that has appropriately brutal connotations.
“I Haven’t Killed Anybody Since 1984.”
Vincent Coccotti
Though he only appears in one scene, Christopher Walken gives one of the best performances in True Romance as the cold gangster Coccotti. While the interactions between him and Denis Hopper make for the movie’s best moment, Coccotti’s reaction to killing Clifford is memorable as well.
After shooting the man in the head, Coccotti is emotionless as he shoots his dead body a few more times. Almost to himself, he remarks how long it has been since he last killed someone as if he is annoyed at returning to a bad habit.