Reese Witherspoon speaks personally about the challenges she has faced in parenthood.
During a Good interior with Dr. Becky podcast, the dear Legally Blonde The actress and devoted mother of three expressed her opinion on exposing and protecting her children from the experience of failure and life in general.
“I see this a lot with parents: I don’t know when we stopped allowing our children to fail. “I learned a lot from the document I didn’t submit or from the demerits I received, which is why they detained me.” Witherspoon shared. “I was suspended from school when I was in fifth grade for talking in class and being disruptive. And write creative notes and pass them on to my friends.”
“And my parents didn’t say, ‘Uh, she didn’t deserve that.’ And take me out of school. In fact, they let me sit there and I feel uncomfortable. So I think learning from failure is actually a valuable tool that can’t be taken away from kids, right? “You rob them if you don’t let them sit in the discomfort of the experience.”
The 47-year-old actress and film producer shares a 24-year-old daughter and 19-year-old son with her ex-husband Ryan Phillippe. She also has an 11-year-old son with her ex-husband Jim Toth.
When Witherspoon’s daughter Ava was in third grade, she came home devastated after her last basketball game of the season because she hadn’t scored a basket. Witherspoon remembers telling her daughter, “Yes, I know. I know, that probably feels really bad. Do you know that too? Maybe you’re just not good at basketball?
Witherspoon shared her daughter’s reaction. “[Ava] It was like ‘What? “Can you tell me I’m not good at something?”
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“It’s actually very important to learn what you’re not good at,” he says before continuing.
“It was very difficult for me as a father. Watching my kids walk into a place like (it sounds really strange, but I’m sure you’ve heard it before) without checking their appearance and clothing. Because I wanted to do that so badly. I was like, ‘No, no, no.’ If you just wear this outfit, it’s cute… And then no one will judge you. And you’ll just fit in.’”
“But I actually thought, ‘Am I hurting them by learning those lessons?’ First of all, self-expression. Creativity. And you know who you are in the world in a group. How is it assimilated? How do you stand out? Which one are you? If I dressed you and told you what to be, literally sometimes just telling kids what to wear can paralyze them later in life,” Witherspoon admits.
“I think the hard part too, as a parent, is age-appropriate failure. So we’re supposed to intervene when… their little hands can’t cut properly. We’re supposed to help them with their motor skills, right? Then intervene with certain things in [a] young, it’s different,” added the actress.
Witherspoon also shared that as a working mother, she had to learn to let go of some of her control as a parent.
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“The other thing I think sometimes moms get caught up in, maybe I’m generalizing, but I hope this resonates, that we’re the only ones who know what to do for the child.”
“It gets a little bit: I had to learn to let it go because I’m a working mother. I had to learn, I had to reframe my thinking, like ‘Oh no, they’re not going to be okay because I’m not there.’ I’m not the one who puts on the soccer cleats, nor am I the one who puts the bow in my hair, nor am I the one who makes the video camera.’ And I had to learn and reframe it by saying, ‘Oh, my kids are learning to adapt to other parenting styles.’ And other people who have authority, who are older or younger or who grew up in a different culture. Or they are actually learning to be a person who gets their needs met with different people and is a person who learns to speak up and advocate for themselves. And for moms who think I’m the only one who can do it all…’ and I’m guilty of that too, it can be harmful to children.”
What do you think of Witherspoon’s approaches to raising her children?
Categories: Biography
Source: vcmp.edu.vn